Menopause, the Nervous System and the Quiet Medicine of Scent

As an aromatherapist and therapist of 37 years, I’ve seen again and again how scent holds women through the hardest of times. Essential oils are not just “nice extras.” They are one of the most direct ways the body remembers safety. A single breath of oil can bypass the thinking mind and speak straight to the parts of us that hold memory, grief, and emotion.

When we think about menopause, the conversation usually begins and ends with hormones. Yet underneath, another layer quietly shapes our experience,the nervous system.

The vagus nerve, sometimes called the soul nerve, runs like a hidden thread through the heart, lungs, gut and womb. It carries messages between body and brain, letting us know if we are safe or under threat. When well-regulated, the vagus nerve supports calm digestion, steady heartbeat, restful sleep and a sense of being grounded in our own skin. But when it is strained by years of stress, trauma, or burnout, the body struggles to leave survival mode. And menopause, with its natural shifts, can tip that system further.

This is why symptoms like anxiety, palpitations, brain fog, exhaustion and digestive issues can feel so loud during midlife. It isn’t only about declining hormones. It’s about the nervous system asking to be cared for.

Here, scent becomes a quiet medicine. Oils like Rose and Patchouli do more than create fragrance. Rose opens the heart, offering softness and compassion when we feel raw or lonely. Patchouli steadies us, reminding the body it can come back to ground even when the world feels uncertain. Together, they form a beautiful balance,tenderness, compassion and strength.

These practices do not have to be complicated. A drop of oil in the palm, inhaled slowly. A few moments of humming or gentle breathing. A ritual of anointing the skin at night. In these quiet ways, the body learns safety again. Over time, the nervous system begins to recalibrate, and menopause feels less like a storm and more like an unfolding.

Menopause is not just a hormonal story. It is also a nervous system story. And when we tend to both, this season can become one of healing, renewal, and even power.

✨ I share more reflections, rituals and resources over on my Substack: Sacred Menopause