The Quiet Confidence of Midlife
Confidence looks different in midlife.
It’s no longer the loud, striving kind that chases approval or applause.
It’s quieter now. Deeper. Rooted in truth.
It’s the kind of confidence that grows from everything you’ve walked through…the heartbreaks, the letting go, the sacred pauses that stripped away who you thought you were so you could remember who you’ve always been.
In this season of life, confidence isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence.
It’s about walking into a room with your whole self intact,no pretending, no performing. Just an embodied knowing that you belong here.
Confidence through the Archetypes
Each stage of our Sacred Menopause journey invites us to meet confidence in a new form.
The Story Keeper remembers her worth. She no longer apologises for her sensitivity or her wisdom. She knows that gentleness is a strength.
The Wild Woman finds her confidence in truth-telling. She no longer shrinks to fit. Her voice becomes medicine.
The Alchemist transforms her pain into power. She realises that everything she’s experienced has refined her.
The Sovereign embodies the confidence that cannot be shaken. It’s not about control,it’s about trust. Trust in her timing, her choices, her voice.
Confidence & the Nervous System
True confidence begins in the body.
When your nervous system feels safe, your voice softens, your shoulders drop, your heart opens.
You stop performing & start living from truth.
Safety creates space for self-expression. This is why I always weave nervous system support into my work breath, grounding, essential oils, gentle movement.
Confidence can’t grow in a body that feels under threat. It grows in one that feels safe to rest, speak & receive.
A Ritual for Confidence
Take a quiet moment for yourself.
Breathe deeply & anoint your wrists with a few drops of this simple blend:
Clary Sage – for clarity & courage
Jasmine – for self-worth & sensual awakening
Bergamot – for the heart, to release fear & open to joy
Place your hand on your heart & whisper:
I am safe to be seen. I am safe to take up space. I trust my own timing.
Let the scent remind you of your strength. Let the ritual become your anchor.
A Closing Reflection
Confidence in midlife isn’t something we find,it’s something we return to.
It’s been within us all along, waiting for the noise to quiet.
When we stop chasing who we think we should be, we finally meet who we truly are.
Kundalini, Grief & Awakening Confidence
Honouring the light that waits beneath our grief
I’ve been reflecting a lot lately. On work. On grief. On loss. On the grief that was never fully processed. The kind that hides deep in the body & waits to be seen.
It’s brought me back to how much I need spirituality in my life. When I turn away from it, I feel disconnected. Life becomes too practical, too busy, too corporate. But my spirit longs for something more … something that reminds me I am not just surviving, I am here to grow. Without it, I feel stifled.
This is where Kundalini is patient. Her quiet energy rests coiled at the base of my spine. Waiting. Protecting. Holding her secrets until I am ready to listen.
When we go through trauma as children, or when loss & neglect weave themselves into our story, that energy can stay buried. It is as if our light is dimmed on purpose, because the body believes it is safer to stay small. I know that feeling, the sense that life might be passing by while I stand on the edge, longing to step in but held back by something unseen.
The truth is, Kundalini is never gone. She is simply waiting for us to create the conditions of safety. When I sit in ritual, when I honour my grief instead of running from it, I feel that spark beginning to rise. Slowly. Gently. Reminding me that confidence is not about pretending to be strong, it is about being rooted in who I am.
Spirituality is not a luxury for me. It is the medicine I need. Without it, I feel lost. With it, I feel guided, held, connected to something deeper than my own story.
The Women’s Health Initiative
The Women’s Health Initiative (WHI), launched in the early 1990s, was a large-scale clinical trial aimed at investigating the effects of hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and other interventions on postmenopausal women’s health. Initially, it promised critical insights into managing menopause and reducing age-related diseases such as heart disease and osteoporosis. However, the abrupt and early termination of its hormone therapy arm in 2002, due to reported increased risks of breast cancer, stroke, and heart disease, caused widespread fear and confusion.
The WHI’s findings led to a dramatic decrease in HRT use, profoundly impacting menopausal women's health care. Many women who might have benefited from hormone therapy either avoided it or abandoned treatment prematurely. This shift resulted in an increase in untreated menopausal symptoms, leading to a decline in quality of life for countless women. Additionally, some have argued that the study's broad application of hormone therapy to an older demographic, rather than younger women closer to menopause onset, skewed the results and contributed to an overly cautious approach.
In light of these consequences, it’s essential to approach WHI findings as a starting point rather than a definitive verdict. Women’s health decisions, especially during menopause, benefit from nuanced, informed conversations that honour both scientific evidence and individual experience. The damage caused The Women’s Health Initiative (WHI) study initially shaped much of the medical community’s understanding of hormone replacement therapy (HRT), largely casting it in a negative light due to perceived risks such as increased incidence of breast cancer and cardiovascular disease. However, subsequent research has revealed that the WHI’s conclusions were overly broad and failed to account for critical factors such as the age of initiation and the timing relative to menopause onset. Contemporary data now supports a more nuanced perspective, demonstrating that when HRT is started in women close to the onset of menopause, it can offer significant benefits with markedly reduced risks. This evolving evidence underscores the importance of personalised, archetype-informed menopause care rather than a one-size-fits-all approach.The WHI underscores the importance of integrating holistic understanding and archetypal wisdom alongside biomedical research to support women through menopause effectively.
A Holistic Approach to Burnout, Confidence, and Menopause
Burnout during menopause is a common yet often overlooked challenge. The physical and emotional shifts experienced can drastically affect confidence, leading to feelings of exhaustion and self-doubt. Understanding and addressing these changes holistically empowers women to reclaim their vitality and inner strength, fostering resilience through this transformative phase.
Essential Oil Blend for Burnout and Confidence Support
Ingredients:
5 drops Lavender essential oil
4 drops Bergamot essential oil
3 drops Frankincense essential oil
3 drops Geranium essential oil
2 tablespoons carrier oil (such as jojoba or sweet almond oil)
Instructions:
Combine the essential oils in a small dark glass bottle.
Add the carrier oil and gently roll to mix.
Apply a few drops to pulse points (wrists, temples, behind the ears) when feeling overwhelmed or low in confidence.
Inhale deeply to soothe the nervous system and uplift the spirit.
This blend harnesses calming and balancing properties to support emotional wellbeing throughout menopause, aiding in the reduction of burnout symptoms while gently restoring confidence.
Embracing Menopause: Wisdom, Strength, and Renewal
Confidence during menopause plays a crucial role in shaping self-worth. As the body undergoes significant changes, women often face challenges that can affect their perception of themselves. Embracing confidence amidst these transitions allows for a deeper acceptance of one’s evolving identity, fostering resilience and self-appreciation.
Menopause can bring fluctuations in mood, energy, and appearance, which may lead to feelings of insecurity or diminished self-esteem. However, when women cultivate confidence by recognising their intrinsic value beyond physical symptoms, they reinforce a positive self-image. This shift in mindset encourages a balanced relationship with one’s body and mind, reducing self-criticism and promoting emotional well-being.
Furthermore, confidence in menopause can empower women to seek support, engage in self-care, and advocate for their needs. This proactive approach not only enhances physical health but also reinstates a sense of control and purpose. Ultimately, confidence nurtures self-worth by affirming that every stage of life, including menopause, holds unique strength and beauty
Affirmations:
I honour the wisdom my body holds and embrace every change with grace.
Each day, I grow stronger in my journey through menopause.
I am connected to my inner power and trust its guidance.
My body and mind are in harmony, supporting my transformation.Title:
Embracing Menopause: Wisdom, Strength, and Renewal
Affirmations:
I honour the wisdom my body holds and embrace every change with grace.
Each day, I grow stronger in my journey through menopause.
I am connected to my inner power and trust its guidance.
My body and mind are in harmony, supporting my transformation.
I welcome renewal and new beginnings with an open heart.
Essential Oil Recipe:
Calming Menopause Blend
5 drops Clary Sage (supports hormonal balance)
4 drops Lavender (soothes anxiety and promotes restful sleep)
3 drops Geranium (uplifts mood and balances emotions)
2 drops Frankincense (grounding and nurturing)
Mix the oils in a 10ml roller bottle with a carrier oil such as sweet almond or jojoba. Apply to pulse points, wrists, behind the ears, and the inner elbows, whenever you need calm and centred energy.I welcome renewal and new beginnings with an open heart.
Mitochondria, Trauma & Essential Oils in Menopause
Menopause is often described as a hormonal change, but it’s much more than that. At midlife, the body’s stress system, nervous system and even our cells themselves come into play. One of the key players in this story is the mitochondria, the tiny “powerhouses” that sit inside every cell.
Mitochondria & Midlife Energy
Mitochondria create the energy our bodies need to function. They convert nutrients from food into ATP, the fuel that powers everything from our heartbeat to our brain. During menopause, fluctuating hormones, inflammation and chronic stress can affect how well mitochondria work.
When mitochondria slow down, many of the symptoms women report in midlife, fatigue, brain fog, low mood, joint pain…make more sense. It’s not just about oestrogen, it’s about the health of our energy systems.
Trauma & the Cellular Stress Story
Research in epigenetics shows that early life stress and trauma can leave an imprint on our stress response system. This imprint carries through to adulthood, shaping how our mitochondria respond under pressure.
Childhood trauma can lead to an overactive HPA axis (our stress regulation centre).
This overactivity pumps stress hormones into the system, which mitochondria are very sensitive to.
Over time, mitochondria become less efficient, which speeds up cellular ageing.
This is why women with a history of trauma often feel the weight of menopause more strongly the body is carrying decades of stored stress that now meets the hormonal transition.
Essential Oils & Mitochondrial Care
Essential oils can’t change our DNA, but they can support the body in profound ways:
Rose & Neroli - calm the nervous system, reducing stress signals that overload mitochondria.
Frankincense - supports deep breathing & oxygen delivery to cells.
Clary Sage - gently balances mood & hormones, helping the stress system rest.
Bergamot - shown to lower cortisol levels & uplift low mood.
Using oils in daily rituals - diffusing, adding to a bath, or applying with a carrier oil -invites the body into a parasympathetic, “rest & restore” state. This is when mitochondria repair and energy is replenished.
A Whole-Body Approach
Caring for mitochondria in menopause isn’t just about supplements or diet -though good nutrition, sleep and gentle movement matter. It’s also about;
Soothing the nervous system (breathwork, meditation, oils).
Releasing old trauma imprints (therapy, bodywork, reflective practices).
Honouring rest as a form of medicine.
When we see menopause through this wider lens, it becomes less about decline and more about healing.
✨ Closing thought:
Menopause is not the end of vitality- it is an invitation to deepen our relationship with our cells, our story and our spirit. By supporting mitochondria, tending to trauma and working with the plant allies of essential oils, we create the conditions for energy, clarity & resilience in the second half of life.
Restorative Menopause Bath Oil
Ingredients (for a 50ml bottle)
Carrier oil (base):
45ml Jojoba oil (skin-nourishing, stable, absorbs well)
Essential oils:
6 drops Neroli (soothes anxiety, calms heart rate)
5 drops Clary Sage (hormonal & emotional balance)
5 drops Rose (deep emotional comfort, supports grief & trauma)
4 drops Frankincense (slows breathing, aids mitochondrial repair through oxygenation)
3 drops Bergamot (uplifts mood, eases cortisol)
Directions
Add the jojoba oil to a dark glass bottle (50ml).
Drop in the essential oils, swirl gently to blend.
Label the bottle with date & ingredients.
To use:
Add 1 teaspoon (5ml) of the blend to a warm bath.
Mix into a small cup of full-fat milk (or unscented bath dispersant) first if you want it to disperse evenly in water.
Soak for 15–20 minutes, focusing on long exhalations to invite your body into parasympathetic rest.
Safety notes
Do not use undiluted oils directly in bathwater (they sit on the surface & can irritate skin). Always mix into carrier oil & dispersant.
Avoid Bergamot if skin will be exposed to sunlight immediately after bathing (it can be photosensitising).
Patch test before use.
Not suitable in pregnancy.
🤍 Rose
Vagus Nerve Reflexology
Vagus nerve reflexology is an emerging holistic approach that targets the vagus nerve through specific reflex points, aiming to enhance parasympathetic nervous system activity and promote overall wellness. The vagus nerve, a critical component of the autonomic nervous system, influences heart rate, digestion, mood, and immune response. By stimulating reflex zones related to the vagus nerve, reflexology practitioners seek to reduce stress, improve digestion, alleviate anxiety, and support emotional balance.
Techniques often focus on areas such as the ears, feet, and hands, where vagus nerve reflex points are believed to be present. Treatment involves gentle pressure and massage designed to activate the nerve's calming pathways. While scientific research on vagus nerve reflexology remains limited, many women, particularly those navigating menopause, report benefits including enhanced relaxation, improved sleep, and reduced symptoms of stress-related discomfort.
Incorporating vagus nerve reflexology within a broader menopause support strategy can complement body awareness and emotional wellbeing, aligning with holistic principles that consider mind, body, and archetypal wisdom. It is advisable for individuals to consult healthcare professionals prior to beginning any new treatment modality, especially those with underlying health conditions.
Embracing Menopause: A Holistic Guide for Women and Wellness Professionals
Mental health is intricately connected to the body’s physiological systems, particularly when considering the long-term effects of childhood trauma. Early traumatic experiences can dysregulate the hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis, the body’s central stress response system. This dysregulation often results in an exaggerated or blunted cortisol response, which impacts mood, anxiety levels, and overall emotional resilience.
The vagus nerve plays a critical role in modulating this stress response. As the primary component of the parasympathetic nervous system, it helps to calm the body after stress, promote relaxation, and facilitate healing processes. Dysfunction of the vagus nerve can be linked to the physiological imprint left by childhood trauma, leading to challenges in emotional regulation and increased susceptibility to mental health disorders.
Healing modalities that support the HPA axis and stimulate vagal tone are therefore essential in trauma recovery. Essential oils, used aromatically or topically within a holistic framework, may complement traditional therapies by promoting relaxation, reducing anxiety, and enhancing vagal activity. Oils such as lavender, frankincense, and chamomile possess anxiolytic and anti-inflammatory properties that can soothe the nervous system and support emotional balance.
Incorporating essential oils into a trauma-sensitive self-care routine can aid the body’s natural healing mechanisms by encouraging parasympathetic dominance and reducing HPA axis hyperactivity. However, this approach works best when combined with other trauma-informed practices such as somatic therapy, mindfulness, and psychotherapeutic interventions.
Ultimately, understanding the interconnectedness of childhood trauma, the HPA axis, vagus nerve function, and the therapeutic potential of essential oils supports a holistic pathway to mental health restoration and resilience building.
Essential Oil Blend for Menopause Support
Ingredients:
5 drops Clary Sage essential oil
4 drops Lavender essential oil
3 drops Geranium essential oil
2 drops Frankincense essential oil
30 ml carrier oil (such as jojoba or sweet almond oil)
Instructions:
Combine essential oils in a dark glass bottle.
Add the carrier oil and gently shake to blend.
Apply 3-5 drops to pulse points (wrists, behind ears, and inner elbows) twice daily.
Alternatively, use in a diffuser to create a calming environment.
Benefits:
Clary Sage helps balance hormones and reduce hot flashes. Lavender promotes relaxation and eases anxiety. Geranium supports emotional stability, while Frankincense aids in grounding and overall wellbeing.
Always perform a patch test before use and consult a healthcare provider if pregnant or nursing.
Essential Oil Blend for Menopause Support
Ingredients:
5 drops Clary Sage essential oil
4 drops Lavender essential oil
3 drops Geranium essential oil
2 drops FrankincenseRose
Menopause, the Nervous System and the Quiet Medicine of Scent
As an aromatherapist and therapist of 37 years, I’ve seen again and again how scent holds women through the hardest of times. Essential oils are not just “nice extras.” They are one of the most direct ways the body remembers safety. A single breath of oil can bypass the thinking mind and speak straight to the parts of us that hold memory, grief, and emotion.
When we think about menopause, the conversation usually begins and ends with hormones. Yet underneath, another layer quietly shapes our experience,the nervous system.
The vagus nerve, sometimes called the soul nerve, runs like a hidden thread through the heart, lungs, gut and womb. It carries messages between body and brain, letting us know if we are safe or under threat. When well-regulated, the vagus nerve supports calm digestion, steady heartbeat, restful sleep and a sense of being grounded in our own skin. But when it is strained by years of stress, trauma, or burnout, the body struggles to leave survival mode. And menopause, with its natural shifts, can tip that system further.
This is why symptoms like anxiety, palpitations, brain fog, exhaustion and digestive issues can feel so loud during midlife. It isn’t only about declining hormones. It’s about the nervous system asking to be cared for.
Here, scent becomes a quiet medicine. Oils like Rose and Patchouli do more than create fragrance. Rose opens the heart, offering softness and compassion when we feel raw or lonely. Patchouli steadies us, reminding the body it can come back to ground even when the world feels uncertain. Together, they form a beautiful balance,tenderness, compassion and strength.
These practices do not have to be complicated. A drop of oil in the palm, inhaled slowly. A few moments of humming or gentle breathing. A ritual of anointing the skin at night. In these quiet ways, the body learns safety again. Over time, the nervous system begins to recalibrate, and menopause feels less like a storm and more like an unfolding.
Menopause is not just a hormonal story. It is also a nervous system story. And when we tend to both, this season can become one of healing, renewal, and even power.
✨ I share more reflections, rituals and resources over on my Substack: Sacred Menopause
Unpacking the HRT Controversy:
What Every Midlife Woman Deserves to Know
For years, hormone replacement therapy (HRT) has carried a shadow, a sense of danger, uncertainty, and confusion. Many women, especially therapists, carers, and holistic practitioners, have internalised a silent fear of MRT. But where did it begin?
Let’s go back to 2002,the year everything changed.
The WHI Study: The Research That Sparked a Storm
The Women’s Health Initiative (WHI) study made headlines worldwide when it claimed that HRT significantly increased the risk of breast cancer, heart disease, and stroke. Almost overnight, millions of women stopped taking HRT. Doctors grew cautious. Therapists and holistic professionals, in particular, turned to natural alternatives, not always from choice, but from fear.
But what most people don’t know is this:
The WHI study was flawed, deeply flawed.
Here’s What Went Wrong:
The study used synthetic hormones (not body-identical HRT that is now widely available).
The average age of participants was 63, and many were years past menopause.
The study was not designed to reflect real-world use for women entering perimenopause or early menopause.
Despite these flaws, the media coverage caused lasting damage to women’s health decisions.
The Truth About Modern HRT
Today’s HRT looks very different from the early 2000s. We now have body-identical hormones (also known as bioidentical), like Oestrogel and Utrogestan, that are molecularly identical to the hormones your body naturally produces.
When prescribed appropriately, ideally during perimenopause or within 10 years of menopause HRT has been shown to support long-term health, not harm it.
Evidence-Based Benefits Include:
Brain Health: Improved memory, mood, and reduced risk of dementia
Bone Health: Stronger bones + reduced risk of osteoporosis
Heart Protection: When started early, HRT can protect cardiovascular health
Symptom Relief: Hot flushes, anxiety, insomnia, and joint pain can all improve
Why It Matters (Especially for Therapists & Holistic Women)
I see so many women professionals, empaths, therapists, silently suffering through menopause, unsure if they “should” consider HRT because they were told it’s unnatural or risky.
But natural does not always mean better. And medical does not mean misaligned with your values.
You deserve to make informed choices.
Without fear. Without shame. Without outdated myths clouding your options.
A Trauma-Informed Approach to Menopause
My role as a trauma-informed menopause mentor is not to tell you what to do, but to help you make empowered, informed decisions that honour your mind, body, and nervous system.
Whether you choose HRT, holistic therapies, or a blend of both, your journey is valid.
Let’s leave fear behind and enter a new era of women’s health: clear, conscious, compassionate, and evidence-based.
Rose
The Menopausal Midbrain: Why We Lose Our Words And How to Get Them Back
A deeper look at memory loss, language, and voice in midlife
We’ve all joked about “menopause brain.”
The lost keys. Even my grandson who is only 2 says when we are ready to leave the house “Where’s nannies keys?”
The forgotten words… like I am often completely mortified when I get my words mixed up, I’m aware of it, but still, it just happens, it also frightens me a bit too… like is this the beginning of alzheimer’s/ dementia… you can’t help think these things when you hit 59 can you!
I tell myself it’s just brain fog, & have a think to see if I have taken my HRT…But what if it’s not just brain fog?
What if menopause is quietly reshaping how we use language, and what we’re really trying to say?
The Midbrain Shift
During perimenopause, fluctuations in oestrogen and progesterone directly affect areas of the brain responsible for memory, focus, and verbal recall. These changes are real, and they’re not just inconvenient. They can feel terrifying.
You forget names.
Struggle to find the right words.
Or completely lose the thread of what you were saying.
And in a culture that already devalues older women’s voices, this loss of language can feel like losing power.
The Brain’s Protective Pause
What if this “mental pause” is the body’s way of asking us to pause on a deeper level?
Because what I’ve come to believe, both personally and professionally, is this:
Menopause isn’t a cognitive decline.
It’s a reorganisation.
We’re not becoming less intelligent.
We’re being invited to use our minds differently, less linear, more intuitive.
Less external, more internal.
The “loss” of sharp language often precedes the rise of deeper knowing.
The Voice Chakra + Midlife Silence
Many women also find themselves going quiet in midlife.
Not because they have nothing to say, but because they’re finally beginning to ask:
“Whose voice was I using all this time?”
“What truth have I silenced to survive?”
“What would it sound like if I spoke from my body, not just my mind?”
This is the throat chakra awakening.
And often, it’s not blocked, it’s just waiting for safety.
What Can Help?
If you’re in this stage, here are a few things I offer and suggest:
Essential oils for the throat chakra (like lavender, frankincense, chamomile)
Humming, chanting or gentle vocal release — to stimulate the vagus nerve
Speaking aloud what you fear — in safe, private spaces
Writing down your inner dialogues, without correcting or fixing
Reflexology & nervous system support to help you regulate and reclaim your clarity
This isn’t about “fixing” menopause brain.
It’s about understanding the sacred unravelling that’s happening within your nervous system and giving it the grace to reorganise.
In Closing
Midlife is not the end of your voice, it’s the beginning of your truest one.
You’re not losing yourself.
You’re being reintroduced to her.
If this resonates with you, you might also enjoy my free resources 👉 HERE
With Warmth & Wild Wisdom
Rose
Menopause Educator & Holistic Mentor
37 Years of Experience | Aromatherapist | Reflexologist | Sacred Reset Guide
Menopause, the Chakras & the Vagus Nerve
A Holistic Approach to Healing the Body’s Deeper Story
We often speak about menopause as if it begins in midlife…
But what if it actually began much earlier?
Not with hormones, but with the stories, stress, and survival patterns held in the body for years.
Many of the women I work with arrive in perimenopause feeling overwhelmed, burnt out, and disconnected. They’re told it’s “just your hormones,” but deep down, they sense something more is happening. Something older. Something unresolved.
This is where chakra healing and the vagus nerve come in.
The Chakras: Where Energy Meets Emotion
The chakras are more than just energy centres, they are a subtle map of our emotional body. Each one corresponds to a specific theme or life experience. When those experiences were difficult, traumatic, or never fully processed, energy can become blocked or distorted.
The Root Chakra relates to early safety and survival
The Sacral Chakra holds emotions, creativity, and boundaries
The Solar Plexus speaks to our confidence and self-worth
The Heart stores grief, love, and the capacity to receive
The Throat holds our voice, the ability to speak our truth
The Third Eye reflects our inner knowing
The Crown connects us to meaning and something greater
As we move through midlife, many of these themes resurface. Especially if our younger years were shaped by trauma, stress, or disconnection.
The Vagus Nerve: A Pathway to Regulation
The vagus nerve is the body's built-in calming system. It links the brain to the face, heart, lungs, and gut, playing a key role in how we breathe, digest, and feel emotionally safe.
When the vagus nerve is dysregulated, often from chronic stress, overgiving, or unhealed trauma, we may experience:
Anxiety and overwhelm
Insomnia or poor sleep
Digestive issues
Fatigue and burnout
Feelings of being “on edge” or emotionally flat
These symptoms are especially common during menopause, yet rarely recognised as signs of nervous system exhaustion.
A Gentle, Trauma-Aware Approach
In my work, I support women through menopause not just as a hormonal event, but as a deeper initiation. A return to self.
Using:
Essential oils aligned with each chakra
Reflexology and vagus nerve stimulation to support regulation
Aromatherapy rituals for emotional release and grounding
Healing prompts to help the body feel safe again
This is not about quick fixes. It’s about soft, steady reconnection. The kind that honours your story and gives your nervous system a chance to breathe.
📥 Download the Free Chakra Reset Guide
To support your own journey, I’ve created a free guide:
Inside you’ll find:
Simple chakra explanations
Emotional patterns held in each energy centre
Gentle aromatherapy rituals
Essential oil suggestions
Vagus nerve care techniques
Reflective journaling prompts
👉 Click HERE to download the free guide
A Final Word
Menopause isn’t the end.
It’s a deep remembering.
Of your voice.
Of your needs.
Of everything your body has quietly carried, and is now ready to release
Rose
Aromatherapist | Reflexologist | Sacred Reset Mentor
BSc (Hons) Women’s Holistic Health
What is Holistic Menopause Support?
Menopause is not just a hormonal shift, it's a sacred transformation. For many women, it can feel overwhelming, misunderstood, or even dismissed. And yet it doesn't have to be that way.
Holistic menopause support offers an alternative to the clinical, one-size-fits-all approach. It honours your body, emotions, spirit, and story, treating menopause not as a problem to fix, but as a rite of passage to be respected.
In this blog, I’ll gently walk you through what holistic menopause support looks like, how it feels, and why it matters.
It’s More Than Hot Flushes
Menopause isn’t just a medical event, it’s a midlife awakening. You might be feeling:
Emotionally raw or unexpectedly weepy
Disconnected from your sense of purpose or voice
Exhausted beyond explanation
Ready to release old roles and reclaim yourself
These are not symptoms to be silenced, they are invitations to go deeper.
My Approach: Grounded, Soulful, Science-Informed
After 37 years as a therapist and coach, I’ve woven together a gentle but powerful framework to guide women through this time. My approach is:
1. Aromatherapy + Essential Oils
Plant wisdom can be a profound ally. I use essential oils to support:
Hormonal regulation (like clary sage or geranium)
Emotional steadiness (like frankincense, neroli, rose)
Sleep, libido, and stress
Each oil has an archetypal energy, a voice of its own, which can mirror your inner transformation.
2. Reflexology & the Body’s Wisdom
Reflexology offers physical relief from symptoms like:
Anxiety and overwhelm
Insomnia
Digestive discomfort
Mood swings
It also invites you back into your body, especially when you’ve been living in your head.
3. Nervous System Healing
Midlife can resurface old trauma, hidden stress patterns, or burnout. We explore;
The vagus nerve and polyvagal theory
Gentle somatic tools
Recovery for women with autoimmunity or adrenal fatigue
This part is about creating inner safety—not pushing through.
4. Archetypes & Menopause as Initiation
You are not your story. You are evolving.
I work with 4 core archetypes that honour each phase of menopause:
The Story Keeper (Reflect)
The Wild Woman (Release)
The Alchemist (Reclaim)
The Sovereign (Renew)
These offer a soulful lens to understand your emotional, physical, and spiritual journey.
🌕 You Deserve Support That Sees the Whole You
Holistic menopause support isn’t about fixing you, it’s about coming home to yourself. Whether you’re feeling lost, exhausted, curious or ready… this path meets you where you are.
If this speaks to you, I invite you to explore more:
Facebook page
Or browse the blog for more soul-led support
With Warmth & Wild wisdom
Rose
BSc (Hons) Complementary Therapies | Aromatherapist | Menopause Coach
When the Body Says "No More": Essential Oils, Autoimmunity & the Sacred Shift in Midlife
There comes a point in every woman’s life when her body speaks louder than her will.
For me, that voice came through exhaustion, grief, an autoimmune diagnosis, and the slow, unravelling wave of menopause. For me, it was a slow burn, gradually creeping up on me, yes U could see warnings here & there… but not that much.
I was a hands-on therapist for decades…always holding space, offering comfort, formulating blends, making things better. But something shifted when my own body stopped responding to the things I used to offer others. My nervous system was anxious, I could feel it. My energy was disappearing. I just felt an overwhelming urge to hibernate, from everyone. I had no energy for anyone, or anything.
It wasn’t until I was diagnosed with hashimoto’s that I realised this was more than burnout… it was a lifetime of avoidance that had caught up with me.
When Healing Isn’t Linear (and the Body Stops Whispering)
Hashimoto’s taught me that healing isn’t about pushing through.
It’s about learning a new language…one that speaks through fatigue, hormonal chaos, emotional overwhelm, & even fear.
For many of us, the nervous system has been on high alert for decades. Trauma, people-pleasing, care-taking, never quite feeling safe.
By the time menopause arrives, the mask can no longer stay up.
The body stops whispering.
It begins to scream: “I need rest.” I just knew… my god did I just know.
Essential Oils as a Sensory Bridge to Safety
What helped me reconnect wasn’t a grand healing protocol.
It was scent. Breath. Slowness. Ritual.
Essential oils work directly with the limbic brain…the seat of memory, emotion, and fear. When we inhale a blend like neroli, frankincense, or clary sage, we’re not just treating symptoms, we’re sending messages of safety to a nervous system that’s been in survival mode for too long.
This is why I call oils a sensory bridge.
They’re not a fix. They’re a way back… into the body, into breath, into a feeling of safety.
What I Now Offer (and Why I Had to Change)
I no longer offer as many treatments. My body asked me to slow down, and I listened.
Now, I mentor women who are navigating this same unraveling:
Women with autoimmune conditions who feel invisible
Therapists & healers on the edge of collapse
Midlife women in menopause, grief, or full-body overwhelm
Anyone who knows what it’s like to feel unsafe in their own skin
I create rituals, sensory tools, and digital guides that help women begin again gently.
For the Wild, Wise, and Weary
My digital shop on my website was born from this season. It's filled with printables, oil recipes, & soul reflections for women who are learning how to rest, recover, & reclaim.
I’m also writing more now, on Substack , where I share longer reflections on trauma, healing, sovereignty, & sacred ageing.
This blog, this space, is where I hope you’ll land when you’re tired of being “resilient.”
You Don’t Have to Push Anymore
Whether you’re here to browse, breathe, or begin again — you’re welcome.
Take what soothes you. Leave what doesn’t. And remember this:
You are not too late.
You are a woman in transition, it has taken you decades to get to this place, there’s no time to waste… & so yes, the time really is now
With love,
Rose x
🕊 Visit: www.rose-washington.com/shop
📖 Read more: Substack – @rosewashington
📷 Instagram: @rose.holisticmenopausecoach
The Forgotten Voice
The Forgotten Voice
Anointing the throat chakra in midlife and beyond
There’s a silence many women carry into menopause …
Not just the silence of night sweats and changing hormones,
but the deeper silence…
of years spent swallowing truth,
softening tone,
shrinking presence
just to keep the peace.
For years, I dressed how I was expected.
Spoke when it felt safe.
Held emotions in my throat until they became illness.
My diagnosis of Hashimoto’s wasn’t random …
It was a message.
This essential oil blend, The Forgotten Voice,
was born from that silence.
Crafted with clary sage, frankincense, lavender, geranium and chamomile,
this blend is both a balm and a boundary.
A ritual for women who are done performing.
Done apologising.
Done dressing for approval.
It’s for the woman rediscovering her voice,
and ready to anoint it, not hide it.
This is more than aromatherapy.
It’s reclamation.
Apply gently to the throat, wrists, or over your heart before speaking, writing, resting or praying.
Let the scent remind your nervous system that it is safe to be heard again.
Ritual: The Forgotten Voice
A throat chakra healing ritual for midlife women reclaiming their truth.
Evening, during a quiet moment
New moon or waning moon (symbolic of release)
When you feel unheard, unseen, or emotionally “clogged”
What You’ll Need:
A small bowl of warm water
A white or turquoise cloth or scarf
A mirror
Your “Forgotten Voice” oil blend (recipe below)
A candle (blue or white)
Optional: a turquoise crystal or piece of jewellery
Step-by-step Ritual
1. Set the space
Light your candle.
Place your scarf around your shoulders or neck.
Take 3 slow breaths, with your hand resting gently on your throat.
Say aloud or silently:
“I honour the voice that was silenced.
I now invite it to return, softly, safely, completely.”
2. Anoint your throat
Using your blend, apply gently to:
The centre of your throat
Behind your ears
Your wrists (pulse points for emotional flow)
Say:
“I no longer perform.
I express from presence.
I am safe to be heard.”
3. Mirror whisper
Look into the mirror and speak softly:
Your name
A truth you once held back
A word or phrase you long to reclaim (e.g. freedom, sovereign, enough, wild, healer)
Let tears come if they need to. Let silence follow if it feels good.
You are being witnessed by you.
4. Release with water
Dip your fingers in the warm water and gently touch your throat.
Imagine cleansing away old words, shame, or expectation.
Say:
“I cleanse what is not mine. I reclaim what is.”
5. Close gently
Wrap your scarf or cloth loosely around your shoulders.
Rest. Journal. Sleep.
Your voice has been heard.
Essential Oil Blend: The Forgotten Voice
A grounding, heart-opening, soul-centering blend to anoint the throat and soothe the nervous system.
10ml roller blend (diluted in jojoba or almond oil):
3 drops Clary Sage – hormonal harmony & emotional clarity
3 drops Lavender – calming the fear of being heard
2 drops Geranium – heart-truth and emotional balance
2 drops Frankincense – sacred connection, spiritual strength
1 drop Roman Chamomile – softening suppressed emotion
Optional: 1 drop Sandalwood or Vetiver for grounding
🌀 Add a tiny turquoise crystal to the bottle if desired.
Use before journalling, speaking, teaching, or resting.
This is not a perfume, it’s a remembrance.
You are softly transforming. And it’s gorgeous.
Why You're So Tired, And Why It's Not Just Menopause
You’re doing all the right things… eating well (mostly), moving your body when you can, trying to sleep.
But you still feel exhausted.
Not just tired…bone-deep weary.
Like your body’s been holding something for far too long.
If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. And no, it’s not all in your head, and it’s not just “hormones.”
It goes deeper. Let me gently explain.
The Forgotten System Behind Burnout + Midlife Fatigue: The HPA Axis
At the heart of your body’s stress response lies the HPA axis, a communication loop between your brain (hypothalamus + pituitary gland) and your adrenal glands. It controls:
Your stress hormones (like cortisol)
Your energy levels + sleep rhythms
Your reproductive hormones (like oestrogen + progesterone)
Your response to long-term trauma or emotional load
When the HPA axis is out of balance , often after years of chronic stress, caregiving, childhood trauma, or pushing through,your body starts to slow down, switch off, or shout through symptoms.
Fatigue. Brain fog. Mood swings. Sleep disruption. Fibroid flares.
Even autoimmune flare-ups.
Melatonin: More Than a Sleep Hormone
We often think of melatonin as something that helps us drift off at night. But it does so much more:
Protects your brain from oxidative stress
Regulates inflammation
Supports the mitochondria (your cellular energy centres)
Helps reduce fibroid growth
Brings rhythm back to a dysregulated system
Low melatonin isn’t just about poor sleep. It’s about poor recovery. And many women in menopause, burnout, or chronic emotional stress have depleted melatonin — without even knowing it.
How Reflexology Can Gently Reset the System
This is where reflexology becomes so much more than a treatment — it becomes a way home.
Through specific pressure points in the feet, I support:
The HPA axis -calming the stress response
The pineal gland - stimulating natural melatonin release
The adrenal reflexes - supporting energy flow
The womb + ovaries - helping hormonal balance return
The vagus nerve - guiding the body into rest, not just survival
Each session is layered with essential oils, somatic presence, and decades of experience in holding women through transitions that feel invisible to the outside world - but deeply felt within.
You Don’t Need to Carry This Alone
Whether you're in the thick of menopause, experiencing fibroids, or feeling emotionally worn thin ,your body deserves care, not criticism. It’s trying to speak.
My job is to help you listen.
If you're local to me, I offer three levels of reflexology support, click on the link below for more information.
Reflexology packages here
And if you're not nearby, I offer custom oil blends, nervous system mentoring, and PDF guides to help you feel supported from afar. Just send me a note with the word “RESET.”
With warmth & Wild Wisdom
Rose
Menopause Mentor & Holistic Therapist
www.menopausemusings.co.uk
The Silent Struggle. Mental Health and Menopause
Menopause & Mental Health: Why We Must Talk About the Silent Crisis
Menopause isn’t just a hormonal shift, it’s a psychological, emotional, and spiritual transition. And for many women, it can be one of the most mentally vulnerable times of their lives.
The Hidden Pain No One Talks About
While society often associates menopause with hot flushes or mood swings, what often goes unspoken is the rising rates of depression and suicidal ideation during this stage. According to recent studies, suicide rates spike for women aged 45–54,the very age group navigating perimenopause and menopause.
Many women feel like they’re disappearing from their roles, relationships, even from themselves. The shift in hormones such as oestrogen and progesterone can deeply impact serotonin levels, leaving women feeling hopeless, irritable, and emotionally flat. Add to this a lifetime of caregiving, underpaid emotional labour, and cultural silence, and it’s no wonder so many feel lost.
For all you Beautiful Women: You're Not a Burden
If you’ve found yourself feeling low, disconnected, or even having thoughts that scare you, you are not alone.
Menopause is a rite of passage, but without adequate emotional support, it can feel like a cliff edge.
Here’s how you can start gently supporting your mind and nervous system:
Aromatherapy Rituals – Essential oils like lavender, clary sage, and frankincense can calm the nervous system and ease emotional overwhelm. Try a few drops on your wrists before journaling or meditating.
Journalling Prompts:
“What do I feel is ending?”
“What part of me is being reborn?”Support Circles: Seek out safe, non-judgmental spaces, online or in person, where you can speak freely about your experiences.
For Therapists: Holding Space Without Burning Out
As therapists and healers, you carry the weight of others’ trauma, often while managing your own menopause transition in silence. The emotional labour is invisible but immense. Who holds space for you?
Schedule in your own nervous system check-ins.
Incorporate essential oil anchoring in your day, apply vetiver or neroli between sessions to ground yourself.
Build in boundaries, energetic and practical.
Burnout isn’t a flaw, it’s a message. You need tending to as much as your clients do.
💌 Final Words
Let this be the reminder you didn’t know you needed: you matter.
You are not invisible. You are not “too much.”
Whether you are supporting others or struggling in silence, this is a call to pause, reconnect, and find support.
Want more resources and healing rituals?
Download the free guide to calm menopause rituals here 👉 Free Ritual Guide
The Healer’s Healing: A Holistic Path for Therapists and Caregivers Facing Burnout and Autoimmunity
As holistic therapists, massage practitioners, and energy healers, we dedicate ourselves to the well-being of others. Our work is sacred. But when giving becomes constant and receiving becomes rare, our systems quietly begin to fray.
Many in our field are now feeling the weight of this imbalance: emotional burnout, financial struggle, autoimmune flare-ups, and a quiet grief that asks, “Is there more for me?”
If this speaks to you, this post is for you. It’s a sanctuary for the overworked healer. A place to remember that you are just as worthy of healing as those you serve.
The Signs We Often Miss
The body always speaks, sometimes in whispers, sometimes in roars. Here’s what burnout and autoimmune imbalance might look like for the healer:
Deep fatigue that lingers even after rest
Emotional numbness, resentment, or loss of passion
Thyroid issues, skin conditions, hormone imbalances
Undercharging, overworking, or feeling unseen in your gifts
You might brush it off as “part of the job.” But it isn’t. You were never meant to deplete yourself for others.
A Holistic Way Home: Reclaiming Your Energy
Burnout is not the end. It’s a sacred turning point. A chance to restore your energy, realign with your purpose, and rise, not through hustle, but through nourishment.
1. Receive the Medicine You Offer
Book a massage. Say yes to Reiki. Allow someone to hold space for you. Your energy field needs tending too.
2. Sacred Oils for Soul Soothing
Use this daily ritual blend to reconnect with your body and spirit:
Healer’s Restore Oil
5 drops Lavender (calms overwhelm)
3 drops Frankincense (deep grounding)
2 drops Rose Geranium (emotional balance)
2 drops Roman Chamomile (nervous system reset)
Blend in 30ml of jojoba oil and massage into your heart, neck, and womb space
3. Rewrite the Story of “Not Enough”
Your worth is not measured by how exhausted you are. You are allowed to charge well. To rest often. To heal deeply. To be supported.
You Deserve to Rise
As I journey through my own healing, from burnout and autoimmune challenges to womb wellness and spiritual rebirth, I’m now guiding therapists, carers, and space-holders like you to find wholeness again.
If you’re tired of being underpaid, overworked, and disconnected from your own magic…
It’s time to come back to yourself, to honour your womb space, your body, your voice, to remember that your healing is sacred.
With Warmth & Wild Wisdom
Rose
Holistic Menopause Mentor
The Healer’s Healing: A Holistic Path for Therapists and Caregivers Facing Burnout and Autoimmunity
As holistic therapists and caregivers, we hold space for others. We offer compassion, energy, and deep presence. But often, the very souls who care for others the most find themselves depleted, drained by emotional labour, energetic exchange, and the unrelenting demands of service.
Burnout in the caring professions is all too common. And in many cases, that burnout can progress to physical dis-ease, manifesting as autoimmune conditions, chronic fatigue, hormone imbalances, or emotional collapse.
This post is a call to the healers, the empaths, the space-holders. It’s a reminder: You deserve to heal too. The saying,'You cannot pour from an empty cup’, is no joke. Let’s explore how to recognise the signs of burnout and begin a nourishing, restorative journey back to wholeness.
Recognising the Signs of Burnout and Autoimmune Overload
Burnout often whispers before it screams. Here are some common signs:
Persistent fatigue that rest doesn’t resolve
Low-grade inflammation, bloating, skin issues
Brain fog, forgetfulness, or low motivation
Emotional numbness or heightened sensitivity
Disconnection from purpose or resentment toward clients
Irregular cycles, thyroid imbalance, or autoimmune symptoms
Autoimmune conditions often follow prolonged stress, unresolved trauma, and burnout. As therapists, we are not immune, if anything, our work can predispose us to this through overgiving and under-receiving.
A Holistic Path Back to Wellness
Healing begins with a pause. It starts with the decision to turn inward and tend to your own sacred needs. Here are practices that support the healer’s body, mind, and soul:
1. Bodywork: Receiving as Medicine
You give healing touch to others, now allow yourself to receive it. Regular massage therapy, reiki, reflexology, or craniosacral work can help restore nervous system balance and clear energetic congestion.
2. Restorative Rituals for Daily Nourishment
Create space for stillness and replenishment:
Gentle movement like yin yoga or walks in nature
Guided meditations focused on self-compassion
Afternoon naps without guilt
Sacred silence to reconnect with your own energy
3. Essential Oil Blend for Emotional Release and Reconnection
This blend is designed to calm inflammation, release emotional tension, and restore energetic boundaries.
Healer’s Restore Blend:
5 drops Lavender – Calms the nervous system and promotes emotional release
4 drops Frankincense – Grounds the spirit and encourages inner reflection
3 drops Geranium – Balances hormones and softens emotional overwhelm
2 drops Sandalwood – Connects to spiritual purpose and deep rest
2 drops Roman Chamomile – Supports emotional surrender and peace
Carrier oil: Jojoba or sweet almond (30ml)
Mix and store in a dark glass bottle. Apply to heart space, neck, and wrists during moments of stillness or before/after sessions.
Why This Work Matters: Honouring the Wounded Healer
Many of us in the healing professions carry the archetype of the Wounded Healer. We have experienced pain, loss, or illness ourselves, and from that place of deep understanding, we guide others.
But your healing doesn’t end when your practice begins. Your body still needs love. Your spirit still needs replenishment. And your inner healer needs tending.
Autoimmunity and burnout are not signs of failure. They are invitations. They ask us to stop, to soften, and to come home to ourselves.
A New Path Forward: The Empowered Healer
As I continue my own healing journey from Hashimoto’s and Autoimmune, I’ve come to specialise in helping therapists, coaches, and caregivers reclaim their vitality through holistic means. Whether you’re navigating perimenopause, burnout, or chronic illness, know that healing is not only possible, it’s your birthright.
Let this be your reminder: You deserve the same care and compassion you so freely give to others.
With love and understanding,
Rose
When it’s time to Pivot:Why I’m Embracing Menopause Coaching & Mentorship
There comes a time when you just have to move into alignment with where you are up to, this is easier said than done. As a long standing therapist of over 3 decades, (A yellow pages therapist) if you know you know :) it was all I had ever known. Yes I qualified as a menopause coach & mentor a couple of years ago, yet still, it was being a therapist that had a stronger pull on me…. until it didn’t any more.
I just couldn’t grasp what was happening, it was such a slow, painful process. It was a kind of grief that I was experiencing, my career had always been a constant, through every painful event in my life, I had no choice but to go to work, I loved it, it was definitely my vocation, my calling.
I’ve spent years immersed in healing work,therapy, aromatherapy, soul coaching, and holistic rituals. I’ve supported thousands of women through heartbreak, burnout, and personal transformation. But recently, my own body became the teacher.
My Hashimoto’s diagnosis arrived during a season of deep fatigue, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. The kind of tiredness that no bath soak or weekend rest could fix. It was a wake-up call. Not just about my health, but about how I was living, giving, and ignoring my own transitions.
At the same time, I began to notice a pattern: many of the women I worked with were entering perimenopause or navigating midlife change. They felt unseen. Unheard. Unprepared. I recognised myself in their stories, and I realised: this is the work I’m meant to do now.
Why Menopause?
Because menopause is more than hot flushes and hormones. It’s a sacred rite of passage, a threshold into our most honest, powerful, untamed selves.
It’s where everything we’ve been pushing down rises up.
It’s where old identities fall away so we can finally ask, Who am I now?
For too long, this stage has been treated like a decline.
But what if it’s actually an awakening?
So, What’s Changing?
I’m now offering coaching and mentorship specifically for women navigating menopause, burnout, and hormonal transitions. I’ll be weaving together the tools that have supported me somatic rituals, archetypal wisdom, essential oils, and sacred self-inquiry.
Whether you’re deep in the fog of fatigue, feeling the ache of invisibility, or simply longing to feel like yourself again,this space is for you.
A Final Word on Pivoting
It’s not always easy to pivot. There’s fear, doubt, the guilt of leaving old identities behind. But sometimes, honoring your truth is the most healing act you can offer to yourself, and to others.
I’m here now, not as someone who’s figured it all out, but as someone walking this path beside you.
If this resonates with you, I’d love for you to explore my new offerings, download a free ritual guide, or simply reach out. You’re not alone.
With warmth and wild wisdom,
Rose
